011: dads on vacation / a bridgerton (sob) story
Nins discovers a universal truth through the help of her safari guide in Tanzania. Arns reminds us that love is a choice through "Queen Charlotte: A Bridgerton Story".
content warning: mental illness
referenced in this episode:
0:00 - Intro
7:55 - Announcement: sign up for our newsletter!!!
9:47 - Nins: Safari
33:27 - Arns: Queen Charlotte
[WARNING: this content contains spoilers]
summary
Guess who tf is back with another season of brb crying!!!!!! "Did you miss us?" Nins and Arns demand. "Did you scroll our Instagrams every single day like, 'Oh, when are they going to be back????? I miss them so much!'"
All jokes aside—Arns and Nins missed their listeners a little too much. "Feeling connected with everyone, sharing something vulnerable and having someone be like 'Holy shit, I felt the same way,'" Nins reminisces. "Damn, dude. I know, I got used to it. I was like, 'Oh, this feels good, this feels warm, this feels fuzzy.'"
Our hosts talk a little more about their time away. Arns confesses, "Taking a little break from this was great for helping me reset," painting a picture of sleepless nights and mounting pressures before their hiatus. Meanwhile, Nins gleefully announces, "I started reading again," only to immediately undercut it with, "I have this goal on my Goodreads account... it's like, 'Babe, you're nine books behind.'"
The hosts then dive into the meat of their return, introducing a sob story from Arns' sister Alexa about a coworker tragically passing. "I couldn't allow myself to cry about it when I read the announcement at work," the submission reads, "but now that I'm home alone... I'm allowing myself to fully cry and sit in this grief." Alexa says she imagines her coworker being greeted by Denise, Taryn Delanie Smith’s beautifully sketched character.
As they wrap up their intro, the duo excitedly announces their newsletter launch, egging listeners to subscribe. "We're excellent writers," they proclaim sincerely. "So what are you waiting for?" So?? What ARE you waiting for???
Nins: Safari in Tanzania
Nins kicks off the episode with a classic Angela-style story, to which Arns interjects: “It's going to be two hours long.” Nins agrees: “Every fucking detail, every angle of the story. You feel like you're there, you know?”
Our journey begins with Nins explaining how she ended up in Tanzania of all places. It turns out, Lu’s work gifted them a travel voucher, and Nins saw an opportunity: "Here's the thing: I can plan Spain in my fucking sleep. Let's use this opportunity and go somewhere that’s unique." And unique it was.
Enter Emmanuel, their safari guide for the week. Nins initially hoped for a younger guide they could "vibe with," but Emmanuel quickly won them over with his warmth and genuine excitement to share his country. As they set off on their first day, bumping along in a Toyota Land Cruiser, Nins equates the ride to "the first minute of the Indiana Jones ride in Disneyland, but imagine that for hours."
Emmanuel's expertise shines through as he navigates the rugged terrain with ease, all while sporting a back brace that hints at the physical toll of his job. When asked about his experience, Emmanuel gets that mischievous dad-joke look on his face. Nins plays along: "5 years?" Nope. "10 years?" Nope. "20 years?" Emmanuel grins, "Little more." The reveal? Twenty-two years of guiding safaris.
Throughout the trip, Emmanuel's passion for his work is evident. Even after two decades, he still marvels at the wildlife, whispering "Oh, magnificent" as a herd of elephants passes by. It's a moment that touches Nins deeply, seeing such wonder in someone who's witnessed these sights countless times.
But Emmanuel isn't just a wealth of knowledge about animal behavior and park geography. He's also a problem-solver extraordinaire. When another safari truck gets stuck in a ditch, Emmanuel springs into action, directing the rescue effort like a seasoned pro. As he successfully tows the truck out, cheers erupt from onlookers. Emmanuel, in typical dad fashion, downplays his heroics: "Sorry about that—you know, a little detour."
It's on their final day together that the most poignant moment unfolds. As they chat about life back home, Emmanuel opens up about his family. His eyes light up as he talks about his children, especially his youngest son who's about to graduate from medical school. "We paid for it, everything," Emmanuel shares, a mix of pride and determination in his voice. "His books, his dorms, his food, his stationary. But every month he'd come home and show us his grades—all excellent, all A's. It just makes me want to work harder, go on more trips for him."
This revelation hits Nins hard. She realizes that while travelers like her come to see new sights and collect experiences, for Emmanuel, every bumpy road and long day away from home has a greater purpose. It's a universal truth that spans continents: a parent's sacrifice for their children's future.
As Nins reflects on this moment, she shares a profound realization: "We travel the world to see new things, experience different cultures, try new foods, take our little Instagram pics, and hopefully learn and appreciate about how other people live. But what if I told you that you could travel halfway across the world and it's still the same story? A person doing something hard for someone they love—that's universal, it's everywhere."
What started as an exciting safari adventure became a deeply moving lesson in human connection. Nins concludes with heartfelt gratitude: "Emmanuel, thank you so much for a life-changing week and a beautiful ending for something that I will be thinking about for the rest of my life."
Sometimes the most profound travel experiences aren't about the destinations we visit, but the people we meet along the way—and the wisdom they offer us.
Arns: Queen Charlotte
This week, Arns pulls us out of the dreamlike landscape of Tanzania and into 18th century London high society with "Queen Charlotte: A Bridgerton Story.”
Setting the scene, Arns explains that the Bridgerton universe is based on Julia Quinn's Regency romance novels, which she describes as "smut-filled period pieces." She admits, "I did not read them. I probably never will." But then she adds, "My mom has read them," before quickly suggesting, "Let's cut that out.” Clearly, they did not cut that out.
Arns gives us a quick rundown of the Bridgerton timeline, flexing her historical knowledge: "It's 19th century because it's the 1800s, which is very confusing, but I went to school, so I know what 19th century means." Ok elitist??
But "Queen Charlotte" isn't just another Bridgerton season; it's a six-episode prequel that multiple people hounded Arns to watch. But it’s so much more than that, as our dear listeners will learn.
We're introduced to young Queen Charlotte, a sharp, well-read German princess who's shipped off to London to marry King George III. On her wedding day, Charlotte is in full panic mode. Per Arns: “She's like, ‘Okay, I guess I'm marrying a fuckin troll.’” In a moment of desperation, Charlotte tries to escape by jumping over a garden wall, only to be stopped by a dashing young man who turns out to be the King himself.
Their first meeting is full of witty banter, giving Charlotte hope. But the honeymoon phase is short-lived: after the wedding, George shows Charlotte to her separate palace. Per Arns, Charlotte is panicking, being like, “Dude, this is our wedding night, this is our honeymoon—” “I shaved my legs!” interjects Nins.
As the story unfolds, we learn that George is struggling with mental illness, likely bipolar disorder. Arns describes his episodes with a mix of humor and empathy: "He'll be completely naked, he'll be like 'Venus in transit!' and he'll be pointing at the sky, or he'll call himself Farmer George." It's a vivid picture of George's struggles and Charlotte's challenge in understanding and supporting him.
One of the most poignant scenes Arns describes is when George is hiding under the bed, telling Charlotte she can leave him because he's only "half a husband, half a life." Charlotte's response: "If what we have is half, then we shall make it the very best half. Together, we are whole." This is a turning point for George, for he finally begins to see himself as lovable.
Fast forward to present-day London, and we see an older Queen Charlotte imparting wisdom about love to her son. Her words are profound: "Love is not a thing one is able or not able to do based on some magic, some chemistry. Love is determination, love is a choice one makes." This sentiment resonates with Arns, who reflects, "I think that there's a lot of wisdom to be gained from understanding that to love someone is an active choice, and just having feelings isn't enough to get us through the fucking hard shit.”
The final scene of the series is where Arns became undone. Present-day Charlotte and George are flashing back to their younger selves—again, beneath the bed. George asks, "You did not go over the wall?" And Charlotte responds, "No, George, I did not go over the wall." Hello. Arns could not breathe, she was crying so hard.
This scene encapsulates what touched Arns so deeply about the series. As she puts it, "There's this wonder in his voice when he's like, 'You didn't go over the wall.' He's saying, 'You chose me back then, and you keep choosing me now.'" This is the enduring nature of love, despite the challenges we face.
Arns reflects on how this portrayal of love differs from the typical Bridgerton fare, so she was a bit shocked when multiple people gushed that it was soooo good! Perhaps all of these people just “get the beauty and the the pain and the suffering and the complexity of it all.” Nins remarks that people often use content as a medium to to communicate what they can’t put into words. So what are they really saying when they recommend this show? That love endures; that this is what happens behind closed doors, what happens once love is tested.” (As they arrogantly conclude: “Send it to us, babe. We’ll explain it for you. We’ll find the fucking words.”)
So what’s the fuckin point of all this? That love is a choice, and a difficult one at that. “When things get hard, one of those choices that we make is reminding ourselves what it was like, how it used to be, and how it used to feel... Even in those dark times, even knowing what lies ahead, we can choose to be playful and light, and we can remember to call each other back, call each other home."
Conclusion
Arns is annoying and has to tie everything together, mentioning that both talked about remembering why we do hard things. Suddenly they’re both tearing up again and Nins has to cut her off.
As they wrap up, they remind their listeners: "Send us your sob stories, send us your cry recommendations.” They also demand, "Write that lengthy review about how we are funny and just so smart." Arns adds, “we have way more listeners than reviews so…let's do the fucking math here.”
They push their newsletter once again, appealing to listeners: "We're excellent writers! We went to school!" So sign up. Again—what are you waiting for??
Until next time…brb crying :’)