001: sweet dreams / grown men crying
in the debut episode of heartfelt comedy podcast brb crying, our hosts share who they are and why crying matters.
nins explores a poignant dream about self-love and arns finds beauty in quiet grief through “A Man Called Ove” by Fredrik Backman and Avatar: The Last Airbender.
CONTENT WARNING: grief, loss
referenced in this episode:
"A Man Called Ove" by Fredrik Backman (Goodreads)
Uncle Iroh's song "Leaves From the Vine" - Avatar: The Last Airbender, s2ep15, "The Tales of Ba Sing Se" (watch)
0:00 - intro: who are we even??
4:12 - podcast overview
4:57 - why crying is important
8:02 - why we started the pod
14:40 - nins: dreams of self-love
24:00 - arns: quiet grief in A Man Called Ove and Avatar: The Last Airbender
episode summary
introduction
Welcome to brb crying, a podcast hosted by Angela Non (Nins) and Ariana Kempis (Arns), two thirty-something teenagers and lifelong best friends. Listen every week as they dive into heartfelt discussions about what makes them cry, offering a mix of laughter, vulnerability, and genuine connection.
our history
Angela and Ariana, affectionately known as Nins and Arns, have been friends for as long as they can remember. Their friendship, which they jokingly say has spanned multiple lifetimes (or are they joking…?), began as family friends. They would gravitate towards each other at gatherings and retreat to a quiet corner to engage in hours-long conversations, oblivious to the world around them. From discussions as eight-year-olds on existential crises and their shared love for literature (jk they literally don’t remember what they talked about; all they remember is ~ how they felt ~), their bond grew exponentially. Their friendship is marked by ann obnoxious synchronicity: they attended the same schools, worked at the same job, and often found themselves wearing the same outfits without prior coordination (gross). Their lives were always intertwined, and this podcast is the only possible outcome of their decades-long dialogue.
The once-in-a-lifetime connection between these silly little girlies is equal parts deep and effortless; now, they're inviting listeners to be a fly on the wall (you’re welcome!) as they explore the things that make them cry. brb crying is more than just a continuation of their conversations; it's a celebration of their friendship and shared passion for storytelling, self-reflection, and the desire to always dig deeper.
what is this podcast going to look like?
brb crying is a weekly podcast where Nins and Arns dive deep into the things that make them cry, whether it's a poignant movie, an inspiring book, a personal story, or a random TikTok, and explore what these moments reveal about our emotions and how they shape our understanding of the world.
crying teaches us so much about ourselves. it gives you some perspective of where your heart is—what it is that's happening in your life that’s bringing out this reaction in you.
-nins, brb crying ep 001
why is crying important?
Crying is a universal experience that often carries a stigma of weakness or embarrassment, but Nins and Arns believe it is a vital part of understanding ourselves and connecting with others. They want to challenge the notion that crying should be hidden or apologized for, advocating instead for vulnerability as a strength.
Crying is not only about being overwhelmed by life's struggles but also about being moved by the beauty and complexity of experiences. It is an expression of our emotional depth and a way to gauge what truly matters to us.
For Nins, crying used to be a private act she tried to suppress, fearing it would burden others or appear as a sign of fragility. However, she now sees it as a pathway to self-discovery. By allowing herself to cry openly, she has learned to embrace her emotions, leading to a more authentic connection with herself and those around her.
Arns shares a similar journey, recognizing that the act of crying connects us to our empathy and the shared human experience. Crying can be transformative, fostering deeper relationships and understanding between people. Nins and Arns hope that brb crying will inspire listeners to embrace their own emotional journeys and see crying as a powerful tool for personal growth and connection.
why did we finally decide to start this podcast?
The idea of starting a podcast about crying had been a long-running joke between Nins and Arns, but it wasn't until they both went through transformative personal experiences that they felt ready to take the plunge. Arns was inspired by a life-changing book (yes, yes, she calls everything life-changing, but that’s because everything is life-changing) that encouraged her to fully feel her emotions rather than suppress them. This realization opened her eyes to the importance of acknowledging her dreams and desires, one of which was to openly share her thoughts and feelings and, to be frank, get paid to do so. This newfound clarity and courage prompted her to reach out to Nins and propose turning their dream into reality.
for the first time, i gave myself permission to feel what I was feeling. because in that same vein, when you allow yourself to feel the ‘bad’—you broaden your bandwidth to feel the ‘good’, too.
-arns, brb crying ep 001
At the same time, Nins had been on her own journey of self-discovery, shedding the perfectionist mindset that once held her back. She had always feared failure and was apprehensive about starting a project like this, especially in a world already saturated with podcasts. However, she reached a point where she realized that the joy of creating something meaningful outweighed the fear of not being the best. (Plus, they’re going to bet you’ve never listened to a podcast like this before. Go ahead, find one. We’ll wait.)
When Arns approached her with the idea, the timing had finally hit its mark. Both women were in a place where they were ready to embrace vulnerability and authenticity, recognizing that the podcast was more about personal fulfillment and exploring a topic that resonates deeply with both of them than purely external validation (but let’s be honest…there’s always going to be a tiny bit of external validation-seeking. We’re human, ok!!!). The decision to start brb crying now is a testament to their healing, growth, and commitment to embracing their emotions and dreams unapologetically.
nins’ segment: a dream about self-love (4/10 tears)
In this episode, Nins shares a deeply personal story about a dream that moved her to tears, offering a heartwarming insight into her journey of self-love and acceptance. She claims it was a “soft three or four” on the crying scale of one to ten, but we love to undersell and overdeliver, (aka it was probably a five).
nins has her arms wrapped around her as she gazes at the camera, accompanied by the words “see & love yourself the way others see & love you”.
She begins by explaining that she has always been open about not feeling ready to have children, despite societal expectations following her marriage to her high school sweetheart (what a loser!) two years ago. The pressure to start a family has been present, but Nins has always prioritized her personal growth and self-discovery before considering motherhood. The dream she recounts offers a surprising revelation. After all, bitches love signs.
In the dream, Nins finds herself in a construction trailer, reminiscent of her years working in general contracting. Inside, she sees a young girl, perhaps a teenager, wearing a hard hat and studying blueprints. Nins is struck by the girl's confidence and beauty and instinctively feels a deep sense of pride, suspecting this might be her future daughter. However, as she journals about the dream, she has a profound realization: the girl is not her daughter but a reflection of herself.
“I’m writing in the journal and I’m describing this girl...and then I had this bigger realization as I was writing it: ‘Is this my daughter?’ and then I thought: ‘Oh...no, that girl was me.’ I was looking at myself.”
This dream serves as a powerful reminder to Nins to view herself through the lens of love and admiration, free from the insecurities that often cloud her self-perception. She realizes that she must learn to be gentle with herself and recognize her own accomplishments, just as she would for a child.
Nins' story highlights the importance of self-compassion and the ability to see oneself as worthy and capable. By sharing this experience, she hopes to inspire others to look beyond their self-doubts and appreciate their unique journey, celebrating the person they have become. Her dream is a call to action to embrace one's true self and to find strength in vulnerability, ultimately leading to a more fulfilled and authentic life.
Arns' section - the beauty of quiet grieving (3/10 tears)
In today's episode, Arns shares two seemingly unrelated pieces of content that made her cry but ultimately reveal a deeper connection: the novel A Man Called Ove and the animated series Avatar: The Last Airbender. As she navigates through these narratives, she uncovers themes of love, loss, and the beauty in quiet grieving.
arns looks off into the distance and quietly contemplates with her chin resting in her hand, accompanied by the words “the beauty in quiet grieving”.
A Man Called Ove tells the story of a gruff, standoffish man named Ove who is dealing with the profound loss of his wife. Despite his initial resistance, Ove's life becomes intertwined with those around him, slowly chiseling away at his hardened exterior.
Arns reflects on how the simplicity of Ove's grief resonates with her. She shares poignant quotes from the book that capture the essence of his longing for his late wife, emphasizing the significance of small, intimate gestures that seem mundane but mean the world.
“Ove closes his eyes and thinks of Sonja. It’s not that he’s the sort of man who gives up and dies; he doesn’t want her to think that. But it’s actually wrong, all this. She married him. And now he doesn’t quite know how to carry on without the tip of her nose in the pit between his throat and his shoulder. That’s all.”
The beauty of Ove's grief lies in its simplicity and the realization that these seemingly minor details are everything when we lose someone dear to us.
In contrast, Avatar: The Last Airbender offers a different perspective on loss and healing through the character of Uncle Iroh. To start, Arns spends a little too long giving context that listeners probably don’t give a shit about. She explains that as a member of the Fire Nation, Iroh is a wise and grounding presence amidst the chaos of war.
Despite his nation's aggressive actions, Iroh embodies wisdom, compassion, and resilience. Arns is moved by Iroh's quiet strength and the way he guides his nephew, Prince Zuko, through their shared journey of redemption and healing. She recounts the classic “Leaves From The Vine (Little Soldier Boy)” song that Iroh sings in his vignette episode. If you know, you know.
Through both these narratives—both about grown men crying, funnily enough—Arns explores the idea that grieving is not always a loud or overt process. Instead, it can be a quiet, introspective journey that allows us to connect with our emotions and the people we have lost.
She emphasizes the importance of acknowledging these feelings, understanding that they are a natural part of life and a testament to the depth of our love and connections. Both stories highlight the power of vulnerability and the strength that comes from embracing our emotions, even when they make us cry.
conclusion
As the episode of brb crying comes to a close, the hosts express gratitude to all who tuned in, with a special nod to Nins’ husband, their one loyal listener. (Will Arns’ husband listen? Only time will tell.) They hope the episode brought laughter, tears, or moments of reflection, and touched listeners on an emotional level.
The hosts encourage support through ratings, reviews, and subscriptions, and invite listeners to share their own stories via their website, brbcryingpodcast.com, or by email at hello@brbcryingpodcast.com. They look forward to returning next week with another episode that continues to explore the emotions that move us, hopefully making listeners laugh along the way.
Until then…brb crying :’)